Three french fries – two people – one meal.

Welcome to the Federal Galley, a foodie jewel in the Northside. It’s a restaurant incubator that houses four aspiring restaurant concepts to give them a leg-up before opening their own shop. It just so happens that 3 of the 4 concepts serve french fries, and so I couldn’t help myself to get all of them and compare. Challenge accepted.

I mean, it’s not very often that you can order 3 different french fries in the same establishment. But if that weren’t all, one of the concepts might be the only place in town to buy duck-fat fries. Yup, french fries made in duck-fat. Can you guess which one it is?

The Contenders

Coming in first on the top is your classic Burger and Fries joint, where their claim to fame is that their fries are triple cooked. Triple cooked. What does that even mean? I suppose we’ll find out. It came with what seems to be a side of slightly spicy ketchonnaise, which they call the house-made fry sauce. (Yes, Heinz, it’s called ketchonnaise, not mayochup.) It tastes delicious, even if it looks like something you can make at home.

Second, to the right, is our waffle fries from the pizza place. I’m still not sure why the pizza place sells a side of fries that doesn’t come with any of their meals. They come crispy, hot, smothered in BBQ seasoning, with a side of ranch. Nice touch.

Last, and most distinguished, is our duck-fat friends. These are served with grated Parmesan, “rosemary” salt, and a special ketchup that’s more vinegary than either of the other two.

On first appearance, all of these look great. But it’s worth noting that the waffle-fries were far and away the most expensive, coming in at a whopping $8. The duck-fat fries were only $5, while the burger fries would have been $6 (if we hadn’t gotten them complementary of the burger). This small detail is actually a big deal. Why does the pizza place think they can sell fries for 25% more? They could just poke their head out and realize their immediate neighbors are undercutting them. I don’t know.

The Verdict

(First, I want it to be clear that the pieces of burger you see strewn about the top plate are not the result of an unfulfilling burger. It was a good burger from what I heard, although it could have had more meat. My friend just had a thing against eating the bun that day.)

So here’s the thing: all these fries were great. But each has it’s own story, and (if you can’t tell from this image) there was definitely a winner.

The waffle fries came off strong at the start. They have a great crunch and a satisfying potato inside that was never under-cooked. The BBQ seasoning made them a bit special, and the ranch was good even if not special. However, when you compare them, they just seemed to be the most expected. We weren’t digging to the bottom on these ones, and their cold-edibility was just above par. In the absence of other great fries they probably would fare better. When you also add the price tag these quickly become the least desirable choice. Sorry folks.

The triple cooked fries were also good. There was some seasoning on it that I couldn’t quite grasp; I kept eating them thinking, “What is that faint taste? It’s good, and not overwhelming.” I think the triple cooked means that the just have more grease inside them, because the ratio of fry exoskeleton to soft potato was very high. So high, in fact, that many of their fries didn’t even have a soft potato part, but just a strangely thick fried part. And yet… they weren’t oily or greasy, and they weren’t too crunchy for some reason. These were some of the strangest normal fries I’ve ever had. They were good, but also not the best. Also, the sauce was great, despite my friend’s assertion that she could have just made it at home. She said these were the least satisfying fries. She liked the waffle fries better because of the BBQ seasoning.

Then there’s the duck fat fries. I really didn’t think these would live up to the hype, and when they came out all fancy-looking and dark-colored, I thought they weren’t going to make the cut. But try as we might, they were hard to resist. It wasn’t the parmesan that made them great, or the rosemary salt (though both were appreciated). It wasn’t even the sauce, refreshing as it was–refreshing because it was a light counterpoint to the heavy fats. These fries just had something to them that made you want to eat the whole plate. Even the small crunchy bits were eaten by the end of the meal, we just couldn’t stop. It had a high crunchy-bit-edibility. Even though it wasn’t immediately my favorite, it was my definite favorite by the end, and that means a lot.

So, there you have it. Go try them out for yourself!